Sex, Dating & Technology: Are Non-Relationships the New Relationship?
Have you heard of this thing called a non-relationship? Yeah, me neither. I took some time reading up on this infamous non-relationship and apparently it's been around for awhile.
It begged the question whether or not these so called non-relationships are symptomatic of today's online dating culture where hooking up and one night stands are much easier to acquire. Or because people have just become lazy when it comes to relationships.
My personal opinion is it could be a combination of both. No one has to put in the work or the effort anymore. It's all become so simple yet for those of us who truly want to find a meaningful relationship it's become a dating nightmare.
By definition a non-relationship resembles a relationship without the labels or the exclusivity. It falls somewhere in between a committed relationship and a platonic friendship. It's not dating, a booty call or even a friends with benefits situation.
Characteristics include holding hands, cuddling and unabashed public displays of affection. You spend much of your free time together doing couple-like activities. Going to dinner, spending the night at each others houses, sending good morning texts, good night texts, flirty texts and even food shopping are all up for grabs.
You look, like a couple, act like a couple but aren't a couple.
Here are my Top 5 Signs You're Involved in a Non-Relationship
I know some women who can't even get their husbands to respond to a text message. I've spoken about communication at length in a few of my previous posts which you can read about here and here. By not having a label, you're removing any kind of expectation or pressure to really make the relationship work or bring it to the next level, so communication becomes a lot easier. As long as both of you are maintaining open communication to ensure you're on the same page things should remain simple and uncomplicated.
One of the most important components to a non-relationship is if you enjoy each others company. If you don't, then it simply won't work. Yes, having sex can be the basis of why you entered into a non-relationship to begin with but it won't sustain a non-relationship in the long run.
Being respectful of the other party is important whether it's a non-relationship or not. Everyone's time is valuable and there's nothing more frustrating than feeling like yours is being wasted. People have busy lives and responsibilities so you have to be respectful of the person, not play games or lead the other person on.
The difference between a friends with benefits arrangement and a non-relationship is that with the latter you will in fact be spending a lot of time together. Since sleepovers are common you will most likely be spending time at the other person's house on several occasions. Can you both go about your daily routines together? Sharing meals, sharing a bathroom, hell just sharing space should be something that comes easy in this type of arrangement. If it's not, then you need to decide of this arrangement is working out for you.
5. Sex and Affection
There are a lot of people who aren't affectionate at all. However for those of us who are very affectionate people it is never frowned upon when in a non-relationship. It's actually a very good thing for a non-relationship as it can be a form of foreplay. You can read about my thoughts on foreplay here.
And lastly we have to talk about the sex. As with most non-relationships, both parties are in it for the sex.
I hope you learned as much as I did from this post and it opened your eyes to something that maybe you weren't aware of . My main goal for this website is to give people, especially women and safe place to openly discuss their questions, thoughts, concerns, and fears when it comes to dating, relationships and sex.
Have you ever heard of a non-relationship or been in one yourself? Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below.